Living in the Spirit… or not….

Posted on June 15, 2011 by Carl Simmons

Got some fruit handy? Go grab some right now. Try to grab more than one of the same kind; grapes are ideal for this little meditation. Take a few moments to really look your fruit over. Then, look over the following two quotes:

“But I say, live by the Spirit and you will not carry out the desires of the flesh. For the flesh has desires that are opposed to the Spirit, and the Spirit has desires  that are opposed to the flesh, for these are in opposition to each other, so that you cannot do what you want. But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under the law….  [T]he fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness,  gentleness, and  self-control. Against such things there is no law” (Gal. 5:16-18, 22-23, NET).

“It is interesting that the Bible talks of the fruit of the Spirit rather than the fruits. A tree may bear many apples, but all come from the same tree. In the same way, the Holy Spirit is the source of all fruit in our lives.”—Billy Graham

So: Which of the fruit (or fruits) listed in Galatians do you think are most evident in your life right now? Which ones could use a little more fertilizer? How come?

Now, let’s come back to your fruit. Some of them are riper, some are smaller, some may even be a bit discolored, but they’re all fruit, and they all came from the same source. They didn’t grow by themselves, and they didn’t grow completely apart from one another. The same is true of us. As Christians, we all belong to Jesus, and whatever spiritual growth we have—whether individually, as a group, or as the church—comes from being connected to the Holy Spirit.

Go ahead and eat your fruit if you’d like; and while you’re at it, chew on these questions, too:

• How does living by the Spirit help us produce the fruit of the Spirit?
• Practically speaking, what does it mean to live by the Spirit? What does that actually look like? Think of some ways right now.

The Bible says the Spirit’s already within those who believe in Jesus (Romans 8:9). Since that’s true, you’d think it’d be pretty easy to connect and live life in the Spirit in all those ways you came up with, right?

But a lot of times, we still feel disconnected from the Spirit—like we’re going through the motions and we’re not sure whether we’re really living life in the Spirit. And sometimes—let’s be honest—we choose not to listen to what the Spirit’s trying to tell us.

Many times, though, we’re just not very good at recognizing when the Spirit’s trying to guide us. We haven’t properly trained our “spiritual ears,” so to speak, to listen for the Spirit. And that’s where we’re starting today. Here’s a couple more questions to think about:

• How would you explain to a friend who the Holy Spirit is and what the Spirit does?
• What would you like someone to explain to you about the Spirit?

Read the following passages aloud. But don’t just read them—act them out, raise your voice, get out of your chair, do whatever it takes to fully convey the meaning here. Be persuasive, convicting, transforming—whatever this passage says the Spirit does, try to emulate it. Better yet, do this with a friend or more. By the way, you might want to put some space between you and whoever’s nearby—it could get loud!

• John 14:25-26
• John 16:7-14
• Acts 1:4-8
• Romans 8:26-27
• 1 Corinthians 2:9-15
• 2 Corinthians 3:7-9, 16-18
• Galatians 4:6-7
• Ephesians 1:13-14

Got it out of your system? Good. Hope you had a little fun, even if it was a little embarrassing. Now you can go back to being serious. Get settled back into you chair and think through these questions:

• Out of these attributes of the Spirit, which ones have you seen at work in your own life? Which ones are new or still kind of hard for you to grasp?
• All acting aside, how can other people help us understand how (or when) the Spirit’s trying to guide us?
• On the other hand, how can others get in the way of us hearing what the Spirit’s trying to tell us?
• How can we better train our “spiritual ears” so we really know whether it’s the Spirit who’s trying to guide us? What would that look like in your own life?

One more quote from Galatians, and it’s likely you’ve seen this sort of thing go wrong in person: “The only thing I want to learn from you is this: Did you receive the Spirit by doing the works of the law or by believing what you heard?  Are you so foolish? Although you began with the Spirit, are you now trying to finish by human effort? Have you suffered so many things for nothing?—if indeed it was for nothing. Does God then give  you the Spirit and work miracles among you by your doing the works of the law  or by your believing what you heard?” (Gal. 3:2-5. NET).

This is a tough passage, but let’s start positive and end positive. And I’ll see you tomorrow…..

• Was there a time in your life that you can now remember and say, “Yeah, the Spirit had to have been in that”? What was that like?
• On the other hand, when have you seen a person or church “[begin] with the Spirit,” then “[try] to finish by human effort?” In the words of Dr. Phil, how did that work out?
• Let’s take that to another level: How do you take—or how have you taken—things out of the Spirit’s hands in your own life? Why do you think you’ve done it?
• What’s one way you need to trust the Holy Spirit to work and bear fruit in your life? Who can help you do that?

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Uncovering Our Blind Spots

Posted on June 13, 2011 by Carl Simmons

Think about your last trip down the highway… the last time you tried to switch lanes, then suddenly had to swerve back because someone in your blind spot was coming up, fast. Not a great feeling, was it? You know, aside from the relief of not getting killed….

Now, think about another kind of a blind spot, the kind that’s been uncovered in your own life—something good or bad that you were incapable of seeing. What (or who) helped you finally discover it? Why do you think it stayed hidden for so long?

Almost all of us have had blind spots in our lives that God’s unveiled to us, and in many cases He’s used others who care about us to reveal those things. It may have been a wonderful a-ha moment for us, where the light suddenly came on. On the other hand, it might have been painful or even made us angry at first, but once we’d gotten past our reactions we realized we’d been done a huge favor.

And we’re called to return the favor. Perhaps the most critical role in growing others is getting them past their blind spots, so they can see the people God’s created them to be, and finally get on with becoming that person.

Rick Warren put it like this: “There is no growth without change; no change without loss; no loss without pain. But the pain is temporary, and the growth is eternal. God is more concerned with our character than with our comfort.”

So let’s reflect again on those times when God’s brought change into our lives. What are some of the ways God’s used to get through to you—including ones others have used with you as they were led by God? Write them down, if you have paper handy. Then reflect on your list. It’s likely you’ll see a variety of ways that the light has come on in the past—and you’ll probably be surprised in the future, too. After all, if you weren’t surprised, it wouldn’t be a blind spot.

God will use anything and anyone to get through to us. And that’s because, for many of us, our biggest blind spot is the inability to grasp how much God loves us. But the truth is, God is cheering us on. He’s pushing us forward. And God is committed to helping us overcome every obstacle we face—even when that obstacle is us.

God doesn’t have our limits, but He wants us to trust Him to overcome those limits we have—or, often more to the point, the limits we’ve placed upon ourselves that God never intended to be there.

So let’s look at how God says He sees all of us—the people we already are in Christ, whether we fully believe it or not—so we can help others see it, too. Check out these Bible passages below:

• Romans 8:31-39
• Ephesians 2:4-10
• 2 Peter 1:3-9
• 1 John 3:1-3

And now, answer this question both scripturally and experientially: Who are you in Jesus? In other words: What does God tell you through his Word, and what has God shown you about the person He’s created you to be?

One more passage: “And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit  intercedes on behalf of the saints according to God’s will. And we know that all things work together  for good for those who love God, who are called according to his purpose, because those whom he foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, that his Son would be the firstborn among many brothers and sisters…. If God is for us, who can be against us?” (Romans 8:27-29, 31, NET).

So let’s put all this together:

• How does understanding how God sees us, and knowing He’ll use whatever we give Him to work with, help us move past whatever we’re facing in life right now?
• How can seeing and remembering God’s love and power in your life help free others to see it in their lives? 

This blog is dedicated to helping others grow into the people God’s created them to be, just as God’s already grown us. But we’re always growing, too. There’s always new challenges we need to face and allow God (and others) to help us through. And sometimes things we’d thought we’d overcome return to haunt us in a different way—or even in ways we thought we were done with. There’s a good chance you’re facing a situation right now, where you’re wondering what God wants you to do next.

Therefore, let’s step back and reflect: Is there an area where you’re having problems continuing in Christ’s love right now?

Let’s take time now to prepare ourselves, so God can better use us to prepare those we care about as well. In fact, allow me to lead you in a little prayer. Let it sink in, and I’ll see you Wednesday:

Lord, we’re willing to change. Change us, as You need to. If we’re in the right place right now and just need to see that, show us. If we’re not, show us our blind spots. Use those people we care about to help us see Your hand.

Lord, guide us. Help us to only take on what You want us to take on. Help us to see everything as an opportunity for growth, no matter what the earthly outcome is.

You love those we love far more than ever can. Help us to see that their lives are already in Your hands. Use us as you see fit. Help us to let go when it’s Your turn to work. Help us each to experience the love of Jesus, even though we can’t understand how truly great that is. But begin to complete us in all the fullness of Your life and power. And help us to trust that Your mighty power can work within and through us, to accomplish infinitely more than we might ask or think.

Lord, help us to trust You with every part of our lives, and helps us to love others the way Jesus did—and does. Amen.

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Lay Down Your Reputation: a fragment

Posted on June 10, 2011 by Carl Simmons

I was recently hanging out in a wildlife area of Colorado, where informative plaques abounded. One in particular caught my eye, highlighting families who’d owned ranches where this area now stood, in the late 19th/early 20th centuries. It got me thinking about all the different ways we come up with to “historically” immortalize ordinary people after they’re gone—and by “ordinary” I mean people we wouldn’t think twice about if they were standing in front of us right now, because they’d be roughly as accomplished or smart or likeable as us. But because they’re no longer with us, we find ways to keep them alive, to highlight the importance we didn’t especially recognize while they were still alive—to resurrect their memories, if you will.

I think we do this, at least on some unconscious level, because we inwardly recognize our deep desire to keep ourselves alive a little longer, even beyond our own time on earth. We believe and hope that people will remember us after we’re gone. We want our lives to have mattered to someone, to have been significant in some way. And even far too many of us among the living don’t feel that. In fact, “the need for significance” gets an unusual amount of play in the church today. You might be feeling that need right now, in fact.

And that’s apparent in the reputations we try to keep—whether it’s a good name or at least a bad enough name that people will remember it. We want to be loved or respected, or at least feared or hated—even if peoples’ feelings are really being directed more toward a persona with our name attached to it than a representation of who we really are and what really matters to us. Either way, however, if we’re not careful, eventually those reputations will own us, rather than the reverse.

And I think that’s one of the biggest reasons that God calls us to lay our reputations down. Not because we need to grovel before God and make absolutely sure He’s higher than us, but because our reputations, no matter how legitimate they might be, become a way of securing and encasing ourselves in a human love that—even when that’s genuine—is less than God’s love for us.

Thomas Merton, in New Seeds of Contemplation, described it as “winding experiences around myself… like bandages in order to make myself perceptible to myself and to the world, as if I were an invisible body that could only become visible when something visible covered its surface.”

As soon as we begin to rest in our own accomplishments and others’ perceptions of them, we drift away from the Spirit. Walk into almost any long-established church or denomination if you need further proof.

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Getting Your Small Group Where God Wants It

Posted on June 9, 2011 by Carl Simmons

I’m still on hold with the new stuff, so one more blast from the past…. This isn’t a brand-new book — it’s a couple years old now, actually — but it’s certainly fresh even if it’s not new.

• Finding the Flow: A Guide for Leading for Small Groups and Gatherings. Tara Miller and Jenn Peppers. Book, 240p., $17.00. IVP Connect.

Don’t let the subtitle fool you — it’s not incorrect, but it’s not the kind of book you might think it is. It’s not a how-to book. It is, however, a what-to and why-to book. Rather than prescribing a strategy for small groups, Tara Miller and Jenn Peppers lay out the elements that make a small group successful… then point out that it’s not going to look the same for every group… then help you make the choices that will work best for your group. And that’s a far more practical approach, in the long run.

From the outset, Miller and Peppers affirm that lots of small-group models work. The trick, they suggest, is finding an approach that accurately reflects the values of your group. Both the opening section and the appendixes are built to help you think through what you and your group really value. From there, building your group becomes a much more natural process.

Another huge point the authors make early on is: While there’s a variety of ways to get there, if the focus isn’t squarely on a hunger for God (rather than on group needs), things will eventually fall apart. That one hit me square between the eyes.

Other sections cover such meaty topics as stages of group life, learning how to listen to God and others, asking questions that go deep rather than lead to obvious answers, dealing with conflict, and developing new leaders.

Peppered throughout each chapter (no pun intended) are many “Do This” suggestions — little ideas you can try either on your own or with your group. As you take these measured risks, your group life will almost certainly be enriched.

Even though it’s a small-group resource, I’ve already gotten this into the hands of one church planter who wanted to start things right with his core team. The principles in this book very much work in that context as well.

Whether you’re starting a small-group ministry or looking to grow your leaders (and yourself) in a meaningful way, this is a great book to help you face the issues that every small-group ministry comes up against. For more info about the book and other related resources, visit www.findingtheflow.org.

An earlier version of this review first appeared on smallgroupministry.com.

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We’re In This Together

Posted on June 8, 2011 by Carl Simmons

We often tend to expect more from other Christians, don’t we? Just about as often, though, these expectations set us up for a fall. Scripture in fact says we’re all fallen people. We’re going to let each other down. It’s inevitable. We’re all lost causes without Jesus.

The trick, then, isn’t simply to pursue relationships with other Christians, but to pursue Jesus together as Christians. The two things sound similar, but there’s all the difference in the world between them. When Jesus is the focus, suddenly all those little things that often get in the way of our relationships don’t seem so important. When we pursue Jesus together, our relationships naturally become closer and deeper, because we’re letting Jesus set the tone. And Jesus is never going to steer us the wrong way.

So let’s dig into this, starting with Acts 1:6-11. Let’s stop for a few moments and try to picture this: One minute Jesus is right there with his apostles—the people He’s entrusted to share His life and message with the rest of the world—and the next, He’s gone. And on top of that, two men in white clothing, presumably angels, show up and in essence say, “What are you doing, just standing there?” How do you think the apostles felt at that moment?

And for that matter, in what ways do you feel (or have felt) like you’re “just standing there” in your Christian walk, waiting for Jesus to tell you what to do?

Cut to Acts 1:12-17 and 21-26. How did Jesus’ followers respond, once they got past their initial shock? A number of ways—they go back to “the scene of the crime,” Jerusalem, to the same upstairs room many believe the Last Supper with Jesus had been held; they pray together “with one mind”; they choose a replacement for Judas Iscariot.In short, they get on with the work they do know Jesus left them to do. And they do it together. And we see the much bigger fruits of that obedience in Acts 2.

Now, think about what that’s looked like in your own lives. How does knowing other Christians you can trust and share your struggles with—no matter what kind of struggles they are—help you to stop “just standing there” and move forward? When has someone who’s been through the same trials really been there for you (or when have your trials helped you help someone else)? Who do you know right now who’s not only your friend but who pushes you closer to Jesus?

I hope there isn’t dead silence at the other end after those last couple questions. But if so, that’s OK. This is huge. We need to find answers if we don’t already have them. As William Barclay put it, “It has been said that true friendship begins only when people share a common memory and can say to each other, ‘Do you remember?’ Each of us is one of a great fellowship of people who share a common experience and a common memory of their Lord.”

If you have a small group, try this activity with them. Trust me, it works: Get a pile of ice cubes. Get everyone to take one ice cube, and then stand in a circle. If there are more than 12 people, form groups of six to eight for this experience. Hold hands with the people on either side of you, and hold the ice in between your hands. Hold hands tightly—with the ice in between—until the ice completely melts. Don’t let go. It’s going to get cold, but remember, you’re all in this together! When the ice has fully melted, drop hands. Blow on them, rub them together, get your circulation back. Then discuss:

• What was it like as you held onto the ice—and it got colder? Did it make it better or worse to know that you were all going through the same thing? Explain.
• How does standing together with others help us to keep Jesus a priority in our lives, even (or maybe especially) when things are tough?
• If you could ask this group for advice or prayer on just one thing right now, what would it be?
• Who right now would you really like to develop a spiritual relationship with? Not just a friendship, but a relationship in which Jesus is the important person in it?

Go make it happen. And may God bless you as you move forward together.

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I Don’t Understand…. But I’m Not Leaving

Posted on June 6, 2011 by Carl Simmons

Who’s the most offbeat friend you’ve ever had? How has your friendship with that person influenced both of you?

And for that matter, when have you been the off-beat person in a group? What helped you find the group’s “rhythm” (or did you)?

It’s easy to be there for people we naturally have things in common with. The people you’re invested in right now might be like that. Then again, you might be wondering why God put you with them.

The answer’s the same either way: God always wants us to push beyond simply the natural and into the spiritual, so that our relationships can glorify God on every level.

And the fact is: Not everyone we can’t understand is the off-beat one. We may be the ones who are “off”—at least to them. And that’s OK, too. Some people truly are different; most, though, are simply different from us. The point is, there are people God puts in our lives that we have a hard time getting in synch with—but God’s not letting us off the hook. He’s put those people in our lives so he can grow them—and us—in a brand-new way.

The most important thing isn’t that we totally “click” with others, but that we’re willing to push forward and help that other person discover how God’s working in them. God wants to do what God wants to do. Our part is to show up and remain open to God’s leading, even when we don’t fully understand the other person or what God wants to do in him or her. The important thing is: God understands. And when we allow God into those relationships, we have something—and Someone—much greater in common.

Still, challenging people are… well, a challenge. But you’ve been there before, probably more than you know. Think about it:

• When have you felt totally unequipped to help someone else? How were you able to help anyway (or not)?
• When have you felt like you were in a situation no-one else—or maybe even God—understood or could help you with?
• Looking back now, what do you wish you could have helped people understand (or understand more quickly)?

And we’re not alone, either. We have both a helper and an example. “For we do not have a high priest incapable of sympathizing with our weaknesses, but one who has been tempted in every way just as we are, yet without sin. Therefore let us confidently approach the throne of grace to receive mercy and find grace whenever we need help” (Hebrews 4:15-16, NET).

Jesus understands our weaknesses, because he faced every one of the same testings we face. And Jesus not only understands us—he also understands the people we’re with, for the same reasons he understands us.

Jesus certainly understood his disciples as well. But the other way around—not so much. And yet, though they dropped the ball sometimes, the disciples ultimately stuck it out with Jesus. And if you’re reading this, you’re probably already a result of that faithfulness. So let’s look at a couple great examples of both the disciples’ confusion and their faithfulness:

“After this many of his disciples quit following him and did not accompany him  any longer. So Jesus said to the twelve, “You don’t want to go away too, do you?” Simon Peter answered him, “Lord, to whom would we go? You have the words of eternal life” (John 6:66-68, NET).

“Then Jesus told them plainly, “Lazarus has died, and I am glad for your sake that I was not there, so that you may believe. But let us go to him.” So Thomas (called Didymus)  said to his fellow disciples, “Let us go too, so that we may die with him”(John 11:14-16, NET).

The first passage is one of the most affecting in the Bible for me personally—you can almost hear Jesus’ voice cracking as He asks, “You don’t want to go away too, do you?” The other one, to me at least, is one of the deadpan-funniest passages in the Bible, if also one of the most inspiring (I’m a lot like Thomas). Your turn:

• Where do you see both bewilderment and trust from the disciples here? How do you identify with Peter and/or Thomas?
• Let’s think back to last week’s session on guidance. How does putting the priority on what Jesus is trying to do, rather than our own understanding, help us to help others? How does it grow us?
• How does sticking by someone, even when you can’t understand what they’re dealing with, lead to understanding?

So, here’s a few ideas to consider this week. Try one (or more) out, and see what happens:

• Who don’t you “get” right now that you interact with regularly? Set aside your discomfort and reach out to that person. Start a conversation—even if you have to finish it, too. Take him or her out for coffee. Discover what you do have in common, and begin building on it.

• Who in your family totally bewilders you? You know who it is. Make time with him or her this week, and just listen. Then, take time to pray with him or her. Really pray. Pray with as much understanding as you have, and ask God to give each of you more understanding. And fully trust that God will provide it (James 1:5-6).

• Who’s your most off-beat friend right now? Enter further into his or her world this week. Set a time to get with that person, but let him or her set the agenda for how you’ll spend that time. (Use common sense, but give him or her permission to take you out of your comfort zone.) You’ll learn more about that person, and maybe even discover you like that activity you’d been avoiding.

• If there’s a church that worships differently from yours—either because of its doctrine, tradition or size—go check them out as a group. Don’t go to analyze or critique (let alone criticize) how they do things, but go seeking to understand and worship alongside other members of the Body of Christ. You just might discover something you’ll want to add to your own worship time together.

Ask God to help you commit to the “off-beat” people He’s put in your life, and to help you become better friends with them, even as you work on understanding them better. Ask for humility to understand how God wants to use these people to enrich your life as well—maybe far more than you enrich theirs.

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a fragment of Lay Down Your Pride

Posted on June 3, 2011 by Carl Simmons

I’ll keep this one short today, but expect I’ll be coming back to this theme—and this passage—repeatedly….

A couple of weeks back we looked at the idea of laying down our thought lives—how to be transformed by the renewing of our minds. Since I didn’t use that passage at the time—and it’s been my life passage since before I was a Christian—let’s go there now, and even use the King James version I first read it in:

“And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God.”

For a guy like myself who enjoys being in his head in the first place, that’s actually a pretty easy idea to fall in love with. (Although I would dare suggest that extroverts are in their heads every bit as much as introverts are—they just want the rest of us in there, too.) And it’s a good one for my non-conformist bent, too—in fact, when I first read this as an I-believe-in-God-but-I’ll be-anything-but-a-Christian 30 years ago, I immediately sat down and wrote an essay on the power of saying “no.” And there’s been even better reasons to love this verse in the quarter-century-plus since becoming a Christian.

But in practice, at least, I also enjoy forgetting that Romans 12:2 is immediately preceded by Romans 12:1 (emphasis mine):

“I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that ye present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto God, which is your reasonable service.”

In the weeks to come, we’ll explore this idea of being a living sacrifice more.   But suffice to say for now: Nothing kills pride faster than having to sacrifice our outward selves.

And it comes back to this idea from a few weeks back: We can believe in our heads all we want, but until we believe to the point that we’re willing to lay our lives down first, all our head-belief adds up to less than nothing.

Stay tuned… because we all need to get better at this.

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The Truth About “The Naked Truth…”

Posted on June 2, 2011 by Carl Simmons

While I’m waiting for the book I was planning on reviewing this week, here’s a blast from the not-so-distant past that’s well worth your time…..

• Randall Neighbour. The Naked Truth About Small Group Ministry: When It Won’t Work and What to Do About It.  Softcover, 256p., $20.99. Touch Publications.

Randall Neighbour has an unusual but appropriate message for pastors: If you’re looking to fix what’s wrong in your church, don’t expect small groups to accomplish that. But if you’re looking to make a healthy church healthier, get going!

“In many churches,” Neighbour correctly points out, “the lead pastor uses small groups to support the larger corporate gathering. Or, he views small groups as one option among many for church involvement.” Both views, he says, are bad reasons to be doing small-group ministry — they end up overwhelming the leader and not engaging the rest of the group.

Neighbour advocates a more organic approach, where the focus is on the sense of community being created within the small groups, rather than as a church-support system or just another ministry among many. And he extends this idea into his approach for creating a small-group ministry as well.

Rather than launch a church-wide initiative as most churches do, Neighbour suggests the exact opposite: Start with one pilot/prototype group. Find out what works and what doesn’t before unleashing a small-group ministry upon the rest of your church. First get it right, then let the rest of the church catch the vision. “Launching a number of groups when you’ve never had experience launching one healthy group makes no sense.”

Likewise, when launching, Neighbour recommends starting with one new group. This gives leaders a chance to develop naturally, and as well as allows time for ministry champions to develop so they can transition from leaders to coaches.

There’s a huge emphasis on relationship-building through this book, as well there should be. Perhaps Neighbour’s most forceful point (and he’s got a lot of them) is: If you’re not willing to make a commitment to others — to put yourself in a position where real discipleship can happen — don’t even think about starting a small group. And heck, potential leader, in that case you probably don’t even want to waste your time joining one. To reinforce the seriousness of his message, Neighbour suggests a fairly rigorous discipleship program for both members and leaders.

There’s a lot of good ideas here, especially for established leaders who are trying to figure out how to make their small groups better. (I particularly liked “The Blessing List,” a means to get groups more outsider-focused without viewing others as “targets.”) There’s also a very useful chapter about intergenerational small groups at the end of the book, written by Daphne Kirk. (Great quote: “The small group is not a spiritual ‘date night’ for parents.”)

On the down side of all this good advice is that I suspect a lot of the more uninitiated readers will look at this and say, “If this is what it’s going to take, it’s too much work to even try.” And granted, it might be a good thing to weed out people who aren’t really committed earlier on. But I think potential leaders are also the audience Neighbour’s really trying to reach here, it’s kind of a shame, too.

There’s probably a way to make all these good ideas seem less daunting. After all, it isn’t that hard to throw a party and get group members involved with one another and connect them with “outsiders.” And there’s plenty of good materials out there to help groups find a sense of mission without it becoming (Neighbour’s own words, and methodology) “boot camp.” And being a real friend to your other group members, while absolutely essential and all-too-absent in a lot of small-group ministries, isn’t something you’re going to learn in any book.

In short, get the book for the ideas and the vision, because they’re well worth reading. Just don’t let yourself get overwhelmed by all the do’s and don’ts here, or feel obligated to do things the exact same way.

On the other hand, if you are up for using The Naked Truth… as the textbook for your burgeoning small-group ministry and feel your church can handle the rigor, by all means go for it! It’s good stuff.

An earlier version of this review was originally published on smallgroupministry.com.

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Worship: It’s Not Just Singing

Posted on June 1, 2011 by Carl Simmons

Over the last several Wednesdays, we’ve looked at different ways to respond to and become more connected with God, such as quiet time, prayer, and Bible study. We often refer to them as spiritual disciplines, but all of them are also forms of worship—ways to acknowledge that we serve a great God, to recognize God’s “worth-ship.” They get us out of our own way so we can see and appreciate God for who he is. Our worship declares that God is God—and we aren’t. And thank God for that!

As we’ve looked at these different approaches to worship, you’ve probably been more naturally drawn toward certain ones rather than others. Or maybe you just can’t wait for Sunday service, so you can let it all out. The good news is: These are all legitimate ways to worship God! And while we should use all of them—and other ways as well—we shouldn’t ignore that God has built each of us to connect with him in our own unique way. So let’s learn more about how we can worship God the way He’s already wired us, and what keeps us from going there.

So, here’s a whole list of questions to consider:

• When you think of worship, what comes to mind for you?
• Out of those answers, which ones do you think most fit God’s idea of worship? What other answers can you come up with?
• Do you normally think of worship more as a shared experience or a personal one? Why?
• Can worship be both shared and personal at the same time? 
• Which activities help you connect with God the most? Why?
• Think about a meaningful time or season of worship you’ve had in the past—of any kind. What made it so meaningful to you?
• How has your idea of what worship is (and isn’t) changed during the course of your Christian life? How has your own worship before God changed, as a result?

It’s amazing how God meets us where we’re at, and uses what we have and who we are. At the same time, we shouldn’t be surprised—God made us the way we are. So let’s start making our way to the end of this… the very end:

“Then a voice came from the throne, saying:

“‘Praise our God
all you his servants,
and all you who fear Him,
both the small and the great!’

“Then I heard what sounded like the voice of a vast throng, like the roar of many waters and like loud crashes of thunder. They were shouting:

“’Hallelujah!
For the Lord our God,  the All-Powerful,  reigns!
Let us rejoice and exult
and give him glory,
because the wedding celebration of the Lamb has come,
and his bride has made herself ready.
She was permitted to be dressed in bright, clean, fine linen’  (for the fine linen is the righteous deeds of the saints). 

“Then  the angel  said to me, ‘Write the following: Blessed are those who are invited to the banquet at the wedding celebration of the Lamb!’ He also said to me, ‘These are the true words of God.’ So I threw myself down at his feet to worship him, but he said, ‘Do not do this! I am only a fellow servant with you and your brothers who hold to the testimony about Jesus. Worship God, for the testimony about Jesus is the spirit of prophecy.’—Revelation 19:5-10 (NET)

Put yourself in the middle of this passage—go from being an observer to a participant, because that’s what you’ll be one day. Does this scene excite you, make you uncomfortable, or does it just not resonate with you at all? Why?

By the same token, how does (or should) knowing our eternal future with Jesus help us make worship—however we do it—a higher priority in our lives right now?

It’s more than a little remarkable to think about, but it’s important to remember that our lives are prep time for eternity. At this very time in our lives, we’re being prepared to live forever in God’s presence. Just thinking about that will help us look at our lives here differently, so reflect on that this week.

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How to Guide Without Steering

Posted on May 30, 2011 by Carl Simmons

We’ve all made bad decisions that seemed good at the time. Bet you’ve already thought of one. So let’s explore that before going any further:

• When has a decision looked like “the right way” to you, yet turned out totally wrong (or at least unnecessary)?
• Looking back, why did you choose that route instead of another?
• What or who got you back on track? What did God teach you, as a result of that time?

We’ve all had times when we’ve thought or felt we had all the right information, but somehow still found ourselves off-course. When you think about it, then, it’s even more difficult to help others to make the right decision. We want to help; we think we know what will help. But even if we’re right, we usually don’t help by simply handing them the answers.

Sometimes we do see what others need more clearly than they do, but they can’t see it. And sometimes we really don’t understand where God’s trying to take them, and we project our own ideas and experiences onto them.

Either way, if they can’t see where God’s leading them, they might never get there. They could go the wrong way, or do something without the conviction that it’s truly God who’s doing the leading—and without that, they’ll likely give up before they ever really get start.

The trick, then, is to get the people we care about to see for themselves where God’s leading. And God can use us to do that, whether we can see where God’s leading them or not. Keith R. Anderson and Randy D. Reese, in their book Spiritual Mentoring: A Guide for Seeking and Giving Direction, make this observation: “The extraordinary events of epiphany or revelation are few and rare, but the gentle or firm probing of a mentor’s questions draw us back to the central action of spirituality: to pay attention for the presence of God in everything.” Here are just a few biblical examples, and you could do far worse than to take a few minutes to read them now:

• 1 Samuel 3:1-10
• 2 Samuel 12:1-13
• Matthew 7:1-6
• John 16:5-15
• Galatians 6:1-5
• Titus 2:1-8

And if you did, here are some questions and quotes to consider:

• What elements of guidance do you see in each of these passages? What challenges do you see?
• Putting all of these passages together: What’s God’s role in guiding others? What’s ours?
• How can we help people focus less on the pieces they don’t understand and more on the ones they already do? How will that help them figure out the rest of their “spiritual roadmaps”?

“All too often we think it is our job to get people in a place where they can call on God, but what if God has already called them? Then our role in someone’s life is to help them respond to the overtures of God.”—Robert Gelinas, Finding the Groove: Composing a Jazz-Shaped Faith

“To recognize an entry gate you do not ask, ‘What are the problems in a person’s life?’ Instead you ask, ‘What is this person struggling with in the midst of the situation?’”—Paul David Tripp, Instruments in the Redeemer’s Hands

Think about the people who’ve helped you get over barriers you’d created in your own head, so you could accomplish something you didn’t think yourself capable of. How did God prepare both you and that other person?

Now, how might God use you to help someone else get past a barrier this week? Look for the opportunity, and take advantage of it. But remember, it’s about God’s call on them. Help them see it, but let them hang onto the wheel—because it’s God’s direction they need to follow.

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