Lay Down Your Baggage: a small-group session

Posted on January 6, 2012 by Carl Simmons

For our purposes today, I’ve edited this so you won’t need to read through the devotionals that go with this study. Should you want to read them anyway, they’ll be in bits and pieces under the following names:

Lay Down What’s Done
Lay Down Your Hurt
Lay Down Your Bitterness
Lay Down Your Addiction
Lay Down Your Idols

So have at it. 🙂

**********

For this session, you’ll need….
• a large suitcase
• a variety of items—at least one per person. Include a Bible, as well as several of the following:

  • work-related items, such as a stapler or even a laptop computer
  • family-related items, such as a photo album
  • items representing personal interests, such as a football, book, backpack, musical instrument or baking pan. The heavier the item, the better—but make sure it fits in your suitcase.

Find an area where you can spread out all your items (and your group members, once this activity starts). Put all your items all out before your group arrives.

Laying Down Your Day (20 minutes)

Take your group member to the area where you’ve placed all the items from your supply list above.

The items here are meant to represent different interests and priorities each of you have—God, work, family, hobbies. So let’s take turns here. Grab an item that represents an interest or priority of yours, and place it inside the suitcase.

Let everyone take a turn loading items into the suitcase. If you have more than one item per person, let everyone have another turn. Load your suitcase up, but be sure you can close it. Once your suitcase is fully packed, say something like, Let’s see how easy it is to carry all this stuff from our lives around.

Take about 10 seconds to pick up and hold your suitcase, and then pass it on to the next person to hold. Let everyone have a turn—and don’t let your suitcase hit the floor until everyone’s had a turn. Afterward, sit back down and discuss these questions:

1. We’ve spent a lot of time this week looking at our need to “lay down our baggage.” Even though we loaded it with mostly good things, how is our suitcase like the baggage you’re carrying in your life right now?

2. How relieved were you to hand your baggage to someone else? What does that tell you about the need to let go—and the importance of helping others to let go?

3. What does it also tell you about the dangers of putting all our baggage on others?

We all have our “stuff.” Some of it—like the items in our suitcase—isn’t all bad, but has taken too much priority in our lives. But as we’ve read this week, we still carry around a lot of baggage from our past, and while we may have moved on from it we’ve never really let go of it. We still carry it around, and it still holds us back from fully becoming who we were meant to be in Christ. So let’s dig deeper into this.

Laying Down the Word (25 minutes)

Have someone read the following excerpt from Day 1. Then, discuss the question that follows.

“Our experiences, to a large degree, have made us who we are. But we are more than our experiences, let alone our negative ones. There’s a life in Christ waiting for us that goes beyond what we would limit ourselves to. ‘Laying down what’s done’ doesn’t mean we forget the things in our past. And it certainly doesn’t mean we stop feeling anything when they come to mind, although hopefully we learn to move on more quickly. It does mean that we no longer allow ourselves to own those things, and that we no longer allow them to own us.”

4. In what ways do you still find yourself defined by the negative experiences in your past? What positive things have nonetheless come out of those experiences?

Have someone read the following excerpt from Day 3. Then, discuss the questions that follow.

“When we refuse to forgive, we keep others in bondage. Jesus says it: ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you bind on earth will be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth will be loosed in heaven’ (Matthew 18:18). Forgiveness, or the lack thereof, has that kind of power. By believing ourselves someone who needs—deserves—to be repaid for the wrongs done to us, we become, in a very real sense, spiritual slave owners. We accuse others of evil, then, instead of freeing them from it, leave them trapped in it. Are those the kind of people we want to be?…

“In short: You don’t get to hold onto your hurt. You don’t get to allow it to fester into bitterness. You don’t get to hold it over their heads. Let Me handle it. You, lay it down.”

5. How does our unforgiveness reveal a lack of trust in God?

6. How does giving your hurts and bitterness over to God release both you and those who’ve wronged you from the bondage of unforgiveness? Share a personal example, if you can.

Have a volunteer read the following excerpt from Day 4, and then have another volunteer read Hebrews 2:14-15, 18. Discuss the questions that follow.

“[A]ll of our addictions—all of our sin, really—is a response to the gnawing sense we have, deep down, that God doesn’t really want what best for us. That God’s will comes at His whim, and at our expense. That we, the created ones, somehow don’t owe everything we have to the Creator in the first place.

7. Whether it’s unforgiveness, caving into an addiction, or any other baggage we carry—what power do you think sin gives you, at the time you’re indulging it? Share as much as you’re comfortable.

8. How does (or should) the fact that Jesus has “been there” help free us from those sins—and to release others as well?

Laying Down Your Life (15 minutes)

Discuss:

9. What idols did you identify in your life as you read Day 5? (Review now, if necessary.) How do they connect with the baggage you’ve identified this week? In other words, how do your past hurts and your current idols feed one another?

Have a volunteer read John 5:2-15, then discuss:

10. What are some reasons that we choose not to get well? How would (or did) Jesus respond to those excuses?

11. Where are you not allowing Jesus to heal you right now—or where do you wish He would but instead you just feel stuck? In what ways might you still be resisting His healing?

Close by praying for your group—or, if you’re familiar enough with one another, pair off. Spend some time praying about your answers to question 11 (and 9 as well, if you have time). Ask God to overwhelm your lack of trust with His love, and to give you a heart that’s willing to lay down your baggage, so you’re willing to receive whatever God wants to give you in return.

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Learning to Live Out of Our Identity

Posted on January 5, 2012 by Carl Simmons

Basically, what we have here is a book about finding, and resting in, our identity in Christ,  and you can never have enough books like that out there. And for the record: We don’t.

David M. Showers. Ten Steps to a Closer Walk With God. 154p., $12.99, CreateSpace.

It’s a bit of misnomer to call it “10 steps,” as if what Showers is suggesting here was that easy or proscripted. (But marketers do consider such titles “catchy,” so there you go.) To his credit, he acknowledges this disconnect up front, and instructs the reader to take things at the pace God sets instead. Perhaps a more accurate title would be “10 Ways to Get Closer to God That We Forget Way Too Easily… or These Days, Possibly Haven’t Even Been Told.”

In fact, the first two “steps” here—giving up control and learning to trust—are arguably the hardest, especially for a self-proclaimed “recovering control freak” such as Showers (and myself, for that matter). They’re probably also the most important and all-pervasive (although the closing “step”—reverence—is right up there). From those launching points of control and trust, however, the fruit discussed later on in the book—forgiveness, humility, faith, joy, availability to others, a deeper sense of stewardship—fall into place pretty readily.

Each chapter concludes with a personal prayer of commitment and an action point—which, more times than not, consists of waiting on God until He gives a specific direction on how to manifest what you’ve just learned in your life. Which again, is pretty sensible advice we don’t get often enough.

The strengths of this book comes from 1) Showers’ own experiences in drawing closer to God (for example, learning the importance of fellowship), and in rephrasing those experiences in ways that anybody picking up the book can immediately get and apply; and 2) constantly redirecting us back into the Word and prayer. Showers’ tone here is totally accessible—anyone should be able to pick this up and get what he’s saying.

In short, this fairly concise book is probably a good choice for that person who’s starting to realize that the Christian life isn’t just something that happens after they die. Use it to help them to see and take those first “steps” to a daily life with Jesus—in this life.

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You’re WHAT?

Posted on January 4, 2012 by Carl Simmons

Over the course of this Wednesday series on developing a God-given vision, we’ve talked about how to deal with setbacks and failures. We’ve also talked about how to deal when nothing much is happening at all. Now, we’re going to talk about maybe the most painful issue of all when walking out the vision God’s given us.

And it’s this: There will come a time when team members you’ve worked with and gotten close to will drop out… and for any number of reasons. The commitment might be too much for them or their families. They might move. God might call them to something else. They might not like the direction things are headed. And yes, they might not like the leadership—which might include you.

No matter why it happens—and again, it will—we need to remember a few things: 1) We should always want God’s best for others, no matter how it affects us; at the same time, 2) what others decide doesn’t change what God’s called us to; and thus, 3) we need to allow God to deal with each person’s decision, and remain obedient to what God’s called us to. So let’s work through this together, and learn how to deal with the issues we’ll have when others leave.

Whether it’s ministry or any other kind of work, turnover usually doesn’t happen in isolation. It affects everyone, and might raise issues you weren’t even aware of before. Therefore, we’ll often experience aftershocks from the departure of even one person, and we’ll need to deal with it as a team. Our first case study is a good example of this (roll with the first several verses—it’s context):

So, being sent out by the Holy Spirit, they went down to Seleucia, and from there they sailed to Cyprus. When they arrived at Salamis, they proclaimed the word of God in the synagogues of the Jews. And they had John to assist them. When they had gone through the whole island as far as Paphos, they came upon a certain magician, a Jewish false prophet named Bar-Jesus. He was with the proconsul, Sergius Paulus, a man of intelligence, who summoned Barnabas and Saul and sought to hear the word of God. But Elymas the magician (for that is the meaning of his name) opposed them, seeking to turn the proconsul away from the faith. But Saul, who was also called Paul, filled with the Holy Spirit, looked intently at him and said, “You son of the devil, you enemy of all righteousness, full of all deceit and villainy, will you not stop making crooked the straight paths of the Lord? And now, behold, the hand of the Lord is upon you, and you will be blind and unable to see the sun for a time.” Immediately mist and darkness fell upon him, and he went about seeking people to lead him by the hand. Then the proconsul believed, when he saw what had occurred, for he was astonished at the teaching of the Lord.

Now Paul and his companions set sail from Paphos and came to Perga in Pamphylia. And John left them and returned to Jerusalem….

And after some days Paul said to Barnabas, “Let us return and visit the brothers in every city where we proclaimed the word of the Lord, and see how they are.” Now Barnabas wanted to take with them John called Mark. But Paul thought best not to take with them one who had withdrawn from them in Pamphylia and had not gone with them to the work. And there arose a sharp disagreement, so that they separated from each other. Barnabas took Mark with him and sailed away to Cyprus, but Paul chose Silas and departed, having been commended by the brothers to the grace of the Lord. And he went through Syria and Cilicia, strengthening the churches (Acts 13:4-13, 15:36-41, ESV).

• We can’t know for sure, but what are some reasons John Mark might have chosen to leave Paul and Barnabas, based on what you’ve just read?
• Based on these two passages, would you have sided with Paul or Barnabas? Why? Come up with as many reasons for both sides as you can.
• Now, what do your two lists show you about how one person’s departure can affect an entire group?
• How can we guard against our differences becoming too big to get past?

Fortunately, our story doesn’t end there:

Aristarchus my fellow prisoner greets you, and Mark the cousin of Barnabas (concerning whom you have received instructions—if he comes to you, welcome him) (Colossians, 4:10, ESV).

Do your best to come to me soon. For Demas, in love with this present world, has deserted me and gone to Thessalonica. Crescens has gone to Galatia, Titus to Dalmatia. Luke alone is with me. Get Mark and bring him with you, for he is very useful to me for ministry. Tychicus I have sent to Ephesus. When you come, bring the cloak that I left with Carpus at Troas, also the books, and above all the parchments. Alexander the coppersmith did me great harm; the Lord will repay him according to his deeds. Beware of him yourself, for he strongly opposed our message. At my first defense no one came to stand by me, but all deserted me. May it not be charged against them! (2 Timothy 4:9-16, ESV, emphasis added).

…and so do Mark, Aristarchus, Demas, and Luke, my fellow workers (Philemon 1:24, ESV)

• What does Paul say about John Mark in these passages? What must have changed?
• What other people are named in these passages, and how does Paul describe their departures?
• How do we keep going when others leave our team—even if they do kick us on their way out?

It’s easy to think of worst-case scenarios like Demas and Alexander, or even Paul’s painful split with Barnabas. The truth is, most of the people in our lives will be more like a John Mark or a Titus. They just move on, or in and out of our lives, for reasons that aren’t personal, even though the sting we feel when they leave is still real and legitimate.

We can never know for sure what God wants to do with those he brings into, or allows to leave, our lives. The people we become closest to can nonetheless be called to other things. And when they leave, it will hurt, even when we’re happy for them. If it doesn’t hurt, we’re not human. But we have to allow God to do his work in each person’s life—including ours. So let’s do some moving-on of our own.

When many of his disciples heard it, they said, “This is a hard saying; who can listen to it?” But Jesus, knowing in himself that his disciples were grumbling about this, said to them, “Do you take offense at this? Then what if you were to see the Son of Man ascending to where he was before? It is the Spirit who gives life; the flesh is no help at all. The words that I have spoken to you are spirit and life. But there are some of you who do not believe.” (For Jesus knew from the beginning who those were who did not believe, and who it was who would betray him.) And he said, “This is why I told you that no one can come to me unless it is granted him by the Father.”

After this many of his disciples turned back and no longer walked with him. So Jesus said to the Twelve, “Do you want to go away as well?” Simon Peter answered him, “Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life,  and we have believed, and have come to know, that you are the Holy One of God.” Jesus answered them, “Did I not choose you, the Twelve? And yet one of you is a devil” (John 6:60-70, ESV).

Let’s face it, Jesus understands being abandoned better than anyone. This passage is just one example. Some time later, everyone else—including Peter, despite his beautiful words here—would abandon Jesus in his time of deepest need. And yet, he chose each of them—even “a devil” who he’d allow to keep following him until the day he betrayed him.

Therefore, we shouldn’t really be surprised by anything that happens to us as we choose to follow Jesus’ leading. But that doesn’t mean we won’t be surprised, or upset, when others we’d depended on and grown close to choose to leave, even for the best of reasons. So let’s see what Jesus wants to teach us through His own experience.

• What different emotions and approaches do you hear in Jesus’ words to Peter and the other disciples? What makes each of his responses appropriate?
• How does focusing on those who stick with us help us not to be overwhelmed by those who don’t?
• How are you dealing with this issue right now—whether it’s a recent issue or one from your past that you’ve never quite gotten over?

Thank God for the faithfulness of each person in your group God has you with right now. Ask God to help each of you past the hurts that come through others leaving or not following through, whether it’s recent or something in the past that group members are still dealing with. And be there for your group—while it is still called today.

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A Question of Balance

Posted on January 2, 2012 by Carl Simmons

What do you normally do when you have too much to handle—let go of one thing to do another, or try to somehow do everything?

Likewise, spiritually, how do you deal with having too much on your plate—let go of your time with God, let other responsibilities drop, or somehow try to do it all? How well does that work for you?

With this new year, you might be thinking through priorities—what to hang onto, what to let go of. Sometimes being overloaded is unavoidable—we have deadlines; there’s a family crisis; sometimes everything in our lives comes to a head all at once. But many times we’re overloaded as a result of our own choices. We take on as much as we think we can handle, but it turns out we thought wrong. Or we really did take on as much as we could handle—and then the unexpected hit, and we didn’t have the physical, mental or emotional resources left to deal with anything more.

Learning to rely on Jesus goes a long way toward getting us through whatever challenges we face. But God also wants us to use wisdom in choosing our priorities and in deciding how much we really can handle, so our lives don’t get overloaded and imbalanced in the first place.

And that might include ministry as well. As Watchman Nee observes in Changed Into His Likeness, “We experienced no difficulty at all in losing sight of what God wants us to do! Just a little overwork—indeed we might say, just a little extra work for God—is all too capable of diverting our eyes from that ultimate vision.”

So tab up, and read Deuteronomy 8:10-18; Matthew 6:24-34; Matthew 11:28-30; Luke 10:38-42; and James 1:2-8. After each passage, ask yourself the following three questions:

• What’s the problem here?
• At what point does it become a problem?
• What’s God’s answer to the problem?

Now that you’ve looked at all four passages together, here’s another couple questions:

• Which of these passages hits closest to where you’re at right now? Why?
• Based on your own reflection earlier, what should your response be—and what would that look like for you specifically?

Now, let’s think about what we might be able to do about the things we’re dealing with. We’re going to start by doing a little dreaming. Make yourself an empty pie chart, maybe 2-3 inches in diameter. Fill it in what you’d like your typical day to look like, if it were up to you. Be realistic—don’t put in 12 hours of sleep followed by 12 hours of rest. But dream a little, too—what good things do you wish you could give more time toward, but just don’t seem to right now?

Here are some general ideas to help you started; use as many of them as you want, or add your own. Be as specific as you’d like. Take maybe three minutes to do this exercise:

• work (including commute)
• sleep
• ministry/service
• eating (including prep time)
• TV/online/texting/gaming
• Bible study/prayer
• family time (where the family actually gets your attention)
• “alone time” with your spouse
• exercise
• chores
• what else?

So, based on the chart you just drew, what things matter most to you?

OK, let’s make another chart. Only this time, you’re going to make your chart represent how your life is really going right now. Take another two minutes to do that right now.

Now, spend some time wrestling with what you’ve just learned about yourself. Reflect on these questions:

• What’s the biggest difference between this chart and your first one?
• What do you think would be different if your life were more like your first chart? How would you be different?
• Be honest: What’s really stopping you from making these changes? What do you think is your first step toward addressing those issues or attitudes?

Take the time to pray about the gaps you see between where you want to be and where you are right now. Pray that God would reveal what things you can let go of, as well as “multiply the time” you have so you can serve God and others you care about the way God’s calling you to—without damaging yourself in the process.

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Go With God, and Keep Going

Posted on December 29, 2011 by Carl Simmons

I was half-thinking of riffing on my last book review and titling this “So Simple, Even a Senior Pastor Could Do It.” I eventually thought better of that idea, but my reasoning was sound… granted, someone could also have fun misconstruing the title I ultimately landed on….

Anyway: In this book, David Holt talks about the privilege and responsibility of pastoring in a way that’s eminently spiritual and yet thoroughly sensible. Even if you just want to better understand your pastor—or at least understand what your pastor ought to be doing—this book is well worth your time.

Dr. David Holt. Pastoring With Passion: Ministering Effectively With Heart and Hands. Foreword by Dr. Wayne Grudem. Softcover, 312p., $17.00. ChurchSmart Resources.

The premise that drives Pastoring With Passion is a simple one, and yet so many churches and pastors miss it that it bears repeating—and heeding. And we start to get it in the very first paragraph, courtesy of Bill Hybels: “The greatest gift you can give your congregation is a spiritually alive pastor.” The entire book is built around that one simple yet often elusive premise.

Holt draws extensively from his 17 years’ experience as senior pastor at First Evangelical Free Church in Onalaska, Wisconsin, which grew from a congregation of 80 to 1,500 during his tenure there. We repeatedly see someone (and a community of leadership) who has no choice but to lean on God, and repeatedly sees the fruits of that leaning.  And yet you don’t some away feeling like, “Well, that’s just him.” The path is tough and less traveled, but it’s fairly well-marked, and Holt puts up a few more road signs to help leaders at every level to rely on God.

In a lot of ways, much of what’s here will feel familiar to pastors. That doesn’t mean, however, that Holt’s just recycling the same old stuff. There’s a freshness to the writing here—this isn’t just someone sharing past experience that he’s moved on from but the feel of someone who’s “in it” saying “Here’s how I keep my relationship with God, and with each person in my church, alive and vital on a daily basis.” And that’s a refreshing thing to read, in more ways than one.

And keeping one’s passion for God, while maintaining a sense of perspective, is at the head of all this. Thus, each chapter focuses on one aspect of that passion, while closing with practical ideas to walk each of them out—passion for God, family, church, purity, word and spirit, humility, identity, preaching, worship, building and capital campaigns (yeah, I thought that too when I first saw it—but once you read it, it all makes sense), and finally, perseverance and longevity (something far too few pastors these days get to reap the benefits of).

Both appendices focus on serving out of our identity in Christ, and seem like the basis for a good book in themselves (maybe the next one?).

Pastors, leaders—you’re not as alone as you often think you are. And Pastoring With Passion will remind you why it’s all worth it.

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Patience, My Dear

Posted on December 21, 2011 by Carl Simmons

What’s the longest time you’ve ever spent waiting for something? How did you handle the wait? What did you learn from it?

In recent Wednesdays, we’ve taken the time to remember that God is still in the mission He’s put us on, even when we run into adversity or failure. Today we’re going to look at another kind of difficulty, which for some people might be even harder to deal with.

And that’s… nothing. We know what God wants to do, but right now everything just seems kind of dead. We might even feel kind of dead. But remember, it took time for God to grow his vision within us, so it’s also going to take time to see that vision grow outwardly.

Making God’s vision real takes a lot of work—in fact, probably a lot more than “what we signed on for.” It might take a while to see any kind of momentum, and even longer to see actual fruits from all our labor. But along the way, good things do happen. And when they do, we need to recognize them—not downplay or dismiss them simply because they’re not what we hoped for, but celebrate them. It’s the little victories that will keep you and your team going while you wait for the big victories God’s got in store.

Recently, we looked at how God got Jacob where he wanted him, despite Jacob’s best attempts to sabotage himself. In this session we’re going to look at a more classic example of patience—Jacob’s grandpa, Abraham. Not that Abraham didn’t sometimes get in the way of God’s plan through his own impatience. So let’s spend some time breaking Abraham’s story down in our groups.

Tab up, read Genesis 15:1-6, 16:1-6, 20:1-7, 20:14–21:3, then think about this:

• What mistakes did Abraham make while (or instead of) trusting and waiting on God?
• What things did Abraham do right? How did those things help fulfill God’s plans for Abraham?
• Which examples did you find yourself more focused on, the mistakes or the successes? Why?
• What right now has got you wondering, “Why hasn’t this happened yet?”  If your impatience were to get the better of you, what would your Ishmael look like?
• What small successes could you focus on, while you wait for “this” to happen?

His divine power has granted to us all things that pertain to life and godliness, through the knowledge of him who called us to his own glory and excellence, by which he has granted to us his precious and very great promises, so that through them you may become partakers of the divine nature, having escaped from the corruption that is in the world because of sinful desire. For this very reason, make every effort to supplement your faith with virtue, and virtue with knowledge, and knowledge with self-control, and self-control with steadfastness, and steadfastness with godliness, and godliness with brotherly affection, and brotherly affection with love. For if these qualities are yours and are increasing, they keep you from being ineffective or unfruitful in the knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ (2 Peter 1:3-8).

Think about a time in your life when God showed up just in time—not your idea of “in time,” but God’s. Then think about this:

• Why does God’s timing in fulfilling his promises usually look so different from our timeline?
• How does remembering what God’s already done help us wait for what He has next?
• What’s one thing God’s doing in your life or someone else’s life right now that you can celebrate, while you wait?

Spend a little more time waiting right now. Just be silent before God, speaking to God as you feel moved to speak—or just continuing to listen.  Wrap up your prayer time by thanking God for his patience with you. Ask God to help you develop that same kind of patience with others, and with the vision He’s given you, and to develop a deeper understanding that God’s time is indeed the right time.

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Fill ‘Er Up!

Posted on December 19, 2011 by Carl Simmons

Even if there’s not one currently in your refrigerator for the holidays, it’s very likely that you’ve experienced the sheer joy of a roll of cookie dough. Some of you can’t even wait to cook the stuff, and just eat the dough raw (or stuff it in your ice cream)….

So, with those images evoked: How would you describe your spiritual state right now? Baked to a golden brown and ready to serve? Half-baked? Burnt to a crisp?

No matter whether you’re in a good place or a bad one right now, it’s always important to remember: No matter how hard we try—no matter how important our “ministry” is to others, or truthfully, how important it makes us feel to be doing it—we won’t get far without God’s power. Or, for that matter, without recognizing that everything we do should glorify God.

Everything we do—no matter how mundane or normal it might seem to us—can be an act of worship. Everything we truly do for God is worship. But we need to stay connected to God to do it. And as incredible as it sounds, we need to allow God to serve us—to give us the things we need so that we’re really serving him back.

As John Piper says in Desiring God, “God’s insistence that we ask Him to give us help so that He gets glory forces on us the startling fact that we must beware of serving God and take special care to let him serve us, lest we rob Him of His glory.” As we reconnect and stay connected with God, the Spirit gives us the power and direction we need to do the things God’s built us for. Without that power, it’s just us thinking we’re doing God a favor. So let’s start by thinking about this:

• What things just seem to drain all the energy out of you whenever they happen?
• Which of the situations you thought of tend to pull you away from God rather than cause you to lean on Him? (Be more specific than “all of them.”)

Now, let’s begin refueling, by spending time in God’s Word. Tab up and read the following passages, and then think through the questions that follow.

• Psalm 50:7-15
• Isaiah 40:21-31
• John 15:1-8
• 2 Corinthians 12:6-10
• Revelation 2:1-5

• Which of these passages resonates most with you right now? Why do you think that is?
• We’ve already talked about circumstances that pull us away from God. When have difficult circumstances pushed you closer to God?
• Why do you think your reactions during those times were so different from those we discussed earlier?
• How can you respond differently to the things that do tend to pull you away from God?

We need “down time” with Jesus, too—time to just rest in Him. Here are just a few ideas to help get you reconnected. Try one, try them all, or better yet, try whatever God’s putting on your heart right now:

• Spend some more time in this week’s readings, especially those that are speaking loudest to you right now. What’s God trying to tell you, and what are you going to do about it? Spend time reconnecting with God and finding out the answer to that question this week. Then take the steps to make God’s direction your reality.

• Think again about how you normally connect with God, and what other ways you might do so. Then try this: Spend an entire day worshipping God in those new ways. At some point during the day, share with someone else what you’re doing, and why. Letting others know you’re making God—and only God—your priority might help them do the same.

• How can you connect with God—in public? This idea isn’t for everyone, but if you’re musically gifted or don’t mind praying with others looking on, find a nearby park and invite a group (maybe this one!) to sing, pray, or worship along with you. Be respectful of others’ “personal space,” but don’t be afraid to let your faith and joy come out. Sure, some passers-by could be put off, but others might be curious about what (or Who) makes you tick. Who knows? You might even get some additional participants—or at least the opportunity to share the Source of your joy.

• Plan a weekend (or at least all-day) retreat, either alone or with your small group. It doesn’t have to be on a secluded mountainside, but it should be far enough from home to not pose a distraction. Be sure to not only set aside times for eating, recreation, prayer and worship, but also at least one extended time (an hour or more) to get alone with God to receive His guidance, meditate upon His word, and appreciate His creation. If you do this as a group, be sure to gather together after this solitary time to share what God may be saying to each of you.

But for now:  Re-read John 15:5, then take some time to confess when you’ve let “doing”—even “doing for God”—disconnect you from Jesus’ strength. Ask for God’s forgiveness and guidance to help you stay connected, even when other things in life try to pull you away. And may you experience Jesus’ love and power even more deeply as you abide in Him.

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Lay Down Your Independence

Posted on December 16, 2011 by Carl Simmons

We’ve spent a lot of time in recent Fridays talking about how to deal with our feelings toward those who’ve opposed and hurt us. Therefore, we’re going to widen our net ever-so-slightly to include one more enemy—you.

All of us have been God’s enemies. And I’m not just talking in a positional, “before we were born again” sense. I’m talking experientially. Like, earlier today—maybe even right now. We habitually assert our “in-dependence from” God. Note how I split that word, and the implications of that. Every time we take matters into our own hands, we very deliberately (however unwittingly) separate ourselves from trusting in God. For all practical purposes, in that moment we’re declaring ourselves His enemies in those matters. We might well come slinking back in repentance later, with spiritual hat in hand… but that’s later.

This isn’t meant to beat anyone up—simply to acknowledge that we operate in this manner a whole lot more than we’re normally willing to admit. And yet, Jesus continues to love us, even when we’re opposing Him (again, intentionally or not). This is why He can so authoritatively command us, “Love your enemies, and pray for them who persecute you.” He not only lived this out during his time on earth, but has confronted our opposition since the garden—and since His resurrection as well.

Think about how you feel when a loved one is hurt or threatened. Jesus feels that way about each of us, especially those within His church. And He’s just as offended, if not moreso, when those who seek to hurt His people are those within the church.

Again, while our offenses might not be as egregious as the ones committed by those people you thought of just now, we’re not innocent here either. We too oppose Jesus far too often, in order to assert our own identity apart from Him—because, well, we just don’t totally trust Him. We withhold love from others because we believe it’ll be rejected or discarded. Jesus says: That’s not the point. The point is: Do you trust Me enough to lay down your independence and obey Me?

We need to love the enemy known as us, too, just as Jesus does. Who needs love more than someone who clearly doesn’t have any?

In a large sense, then, laying down our independence isn’t only about letting Jesus in, but letting others in as well—to run the risk of incurring enemies, to run the risk of even good people opposing your good plans. And then, love them anyway. God does not let us off this hook. Because Jesus Himself was not let off this hook. The people in front of Jesus weren’t obstacles in His path—they were His path. And we’re called to follow that path.

You were never in this alone. You never will be, no matter how much you choose to live as if you were. So lay down your independence, and become the person Jesus calls you to be.

Lay It Down Today

Who are your “enemies” right now? Again, broaden your definition as far as you need to. Don’t only focus on those who’ve hurt you—again, you hopefully dealt with a lot of that last week—or those who obviously oppose the gospel. Who’s “in your way” right now? Who’s standing between you and what you want? And how is Jesus calling you to respond to them in love, instead of responding to how they’re opposing you?

Release your hold on your way, or your need for vengeance or justification, to God right now. Confess your insistence on your own way—the way you’ve treated God like an enemy—and ask Him to help you receive His love and to help you extend it to others, particularly those you’ve just named. Then, take the steps you need to express that love tangibly, and trust God to be there when you do.

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Grow, Team!

Posted on December 14, 2011 by Carl Simmons

What’s your favorite team or organization? Why? (And hey, who doesn’t love a team with a mascot that looks, and frankly acts, like Barney’s deformed brother? –>)

What’s the best team, organization, or group you’ve been a part of? What made it such a positive experience?

If you haven’t already guessed, we’re going to look at the importance of teamwork. The people you pursue a God-given vision with are the people who’ll make it real to everyone else; therefore, and the more life you share with them, the more life your vision will take on. Your team isn’t just a group of people trying to accomplish a task; hopefully you’re also becoming friends working toward a common vision. As Watchman Nee notes in Changed Into His Likeness, “Everyone knows how difficult it is for Christians to live together! When by the grace of God it happens, and continues to happen, even hell takes notice.”

Friends have fun together, too. Sometimes a little fun is exactly what you need to become closer and move forward together. So consider working through today’s post with your team—and I’ll write with that assumption in place. Maybe it’ll even serve as a good holiday icebreaker. (And if you’re doing this alone, talk to yourself instead of the group. It’s OK, nobody’s gonna hear you talk to yourself anyway—you’re alone, right?) Have some fun today, and discover how far you’ve already come together:

Give everyone a piece of paper; make sure they all have something to write with. Then say something like:

For the next three minutes, you’re going to spend time discovering what you have in common. And you’re going to have to talk to each other to find out what those things are. Maybe you like the same kind of music, the same foods, or the same activities. So find a partner and ask.” (And again, if you’re alone, think of your team members, then start thinking this through.) You can’t take the cheap way out and talk about physical features like ‘We both have blue eyes’ or ‘We both have noses.’ Discover something new about the actual person you’re talking with.

Once your pair has come up with something, find someone else to pair up with and discover something you have in common with that person. Then go on to the next person. You can’t use the same thing twice; it has to be something unique to the pair you’re in.

Again, you have three minutes to come up with as many matches as you can. Go!

Give a warning when 30 seconds are remaining. When time is up, find out who has the longest list and give him or her a round of applause. Then discuss:

• How easy or difficult was it to discover things you have in common?
• What activity might you be able to do with someone you talked with, based on what you discovered together?

Let’s look at other ways we can build teamwork as Christians. Today we’re not going to break down a Bible story for our case study, but we are going to look at a longer passage where Paul is encouraging a specific church:

For by the grace given to me I say to everyone among you not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think, but to think with sober judgment, each according to the measure of faith that God has assigned. For as in one body we have many members, and the members do not all have the same function, so we, though many, are one body in Christ, and individually members one of another.  Having gifts that differ according to the grace given to us, let us use them: if prophecy, in proportion to our faith; if service, in our serving; the one who teaches, in his teaching; the one who exhorts, in his exhortation; the one who contributes, in generosity; the one who leads,with zeal; the one who does acts of mercy, with cheerfulness.

Let love be genuine. Abhor what is evil; hold fast to what is good. Love one another with brotherly affection. Outdo one another in showing honor. Do not be slothful in zeal, be fervent in spirit, serve the Lord. Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer. Contribute to the needs of the saints and seek to show hospitality (Romans 12:3-13, ESV).

• Which of the roles Paul talks about best describes you? Which of your current (or potential) teammates would fit into some of the other gifts mentioned?
• Look again at verses 9-13 (the 2nd paragraph). Who do you know who excels in some of the specific character qualities listed here? Talk a little about him or her.
• Think about the “teammates” you currently have in pursuing this vision. What other things do you already have in common? How could you use those in a way that builds up your team?
• How could you also celebrate the variety of gifts, passions, and qualities in your team members? Be specific.

Dietrich Bonhoeffer, in Life Together, puts it this way: “Christian brotherhood is not an ideal which we must realize; it is rather a reality created by God in Christ in which we may participate.” So before our next activity, let’s take a quick step back, exhale, and think about a few things we may have forgotten or overlooked over the course of this season.

Find some wall space you can use, at least temporarily—if you can leave your work up afterward, all the better. Either put up a long piece of newsprint, or give everyone two pieces of paper. Also give everyone a Sharpie or marker. Divide your sheet or wall space into three sections—”Before” on the left, and “After” on the right; leave the middle space blank for now. Then say something along the lines of:

Think about the fact that you’re working through this session together. Now, think about the fact that there are people around the country either working through this right now or who already have worked through it***. So, you’re already a part of a much bigger group. And you’re part of a far bigger group than that. You’re a part of Jesus’ church. The church He started.  The church He’s been renewing the vision of for centuries. The church He’s coming back for.

The vision you’re a part of is going to get bigger, too. As that happens, you’ll draw more and more people onto your team, and that will mean sharing the vision and allowing it to expand with each person you share it with. So we’re going to have a little more fun today making that idea come to life. We’ve talked a lot about sharing the “big picture.” But today—with this entire group as our team—we’re going to make a big picture. And all of you are going to contribute.

Each of you are going to draw two pictures. Don’t worry about your artistic ability or the lack thereof—just draw two pictures that illustrate the following: The first picture, on the ‘Before’ side, should portray your church or ministry today. Your second picture, on the ‘After’ side, should represent what you believe your church could be in the future, as result of this vision God’s planted in each of you. Make sure there’s a connection between each of your ‘Before’ and ‘After’ pictures.

You’ll have 10 minutes to make your contributions to our poster. So grab a marker and get started.

After 10 minutes, bring everyone back together. Ask for a few volunteers to share about their drawings. Congratulate everyone for bringing their vision to the table—or more specifically, the wall. Allow them to take a good long look at their full “Before” and “After” pictures. Then discuss:

• What do your “Before” and “After” frames tell you about how we currently view the church—and about the kind of church/ministry we envision?
• What did you discover about each other through the pictures and visions we’ve shared together?
• What connections do you see between the different pictures people drew? What does that suggest about what God can do with the teams you’re on?

So if there is any encouragement in Christ, any comfort from love, any participation in the Spirit, any affection and sympathy, complete my joy by being of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord and of one mind. Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves (Philippians 2:1-3, ESV).

Take another look at the column in the middle of your big picture, then discuss:

• What would best help get your team “working together with one mind and purpose” right now—and help move them from the “Before” column to the “After” column?

Read Philippians 2:1-3 again, and then close your group’s prayer time. Ask God to give each person a deeper sense of belonging to one another—and a deeper sense of how much all of you belong to Jesus. Ask God to open each person’s eyes to new opportunities to connect with their “teammates,” and to help each other allow God to take those connections as far as He wants to.

**********

***True, this is only a blog post, but as it’s based on a session from Season 6 in the Growing Out series, Growing in Your Mission, it’s also a true statement. (And you can get it dirt-cheap right now — follow the second link.) Thus, to my knowledge, there’s very arguably been 5,000 people who’ve worked through this alongside you. If you let that sink in at your end, I’ll let that sink in at mine. 🙂

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Without Love, I’m Nothing

Posted on December 12, 2011 by Carl Simmons

Think about your last bad experience while going out to eat, whether it was a four-star restaurant or a fast-food joint….

What went wrong? What could have been prevented, and how? How could—or did—others help make things right, even if it wasn’t their fault? Would you give that place another chance? Why or why not?

The fact is, we all mess up from time to time—even when we’re genuinely trying serve others. And as we begin to take our spiritual gifts and passions and venture out into the unknown, it’s pretty much guaranteed that we’ll fail on occasion. But part of moving forward—maybe the biggest part—is how we respond to those failures, because it reveals a lot about what our motivations really are. If we’re simply trying to fulfill a task, make ourselves look good, or save face, we’ll usually end up looking more like those “servants” who gave us all such memorably bad meals.

So let’s explore further. You might be able to recite the second half of the following passage by heart, but let’s also see what leads into it:

Now you are the body of Christ and individually members of it. And God has appointed in the church first apostles, second prophets, third teachers, then miracles, then gifts of healing, helping, administrating, and various kinds of tongues. Are all apostles? Are all prophets? Are all teachers? Do all work miracles? Do all possess gifts of healing? Do all speak with tongues? Do all interpret? But earnestly desire the higher gifts.

And I will show you a still more excellent way.

If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give away all I have, and if I deliver up my body to be burned, but have not love, I gain nothing (1 Corinthians 12:27-13:3, ESV).

• Think about a time when you did all the right things for someone, but not in a loving way. What were the results?
• What would you do differently if you had another chance?
• Go back to verse 27, and reflect once more on your dining experience. Why is it important to “pick each other up” rather than leave others to fend for themselves? What are some of the challenges in doing that?

As Mother Teresa once said, “We can do no great things, just small things with great love. It is not how much you do, but how much love you put into doing it.” So let’s look more at how the love of Jesus can spill over into every other part of our lives—and into others’ lives as well.

By this we know love, that he laid down his life for us, and we ought to lay down our lives for the brothers. But if anyone has the world’s goods and sees his brother in need, yet closes his heart against him, how does God’s love abide in him? Little children, let us not love in word or talk but in deed and in truth.

By this we shall know that we are of the truth and reassure our heart before him; for whenever our heart condemns us, God is greater than our heart, and he knows everything (1 John 3:16-20, ESV).

• How does John’s command to “give up our lives for our brothers and sisters” make you feel? Challenged? Frightened? Overwhelmed? Something else?
• Regardless of your reaction, why is it still important to do it?
• Think of someone you’ve had a particularly hard time showing Jesus’ love to. What’s one practical way you could “give up your life” for that person?

Since it’s Christmastime, let’s cut to that classic How the Grinch Stole Christmas. Go here, move the counter to 5:13, and let it rip. Afterward, reflect on these questions:

• When has love given you the strength to do things you couldn’t have done otherwise?
• What would other people see if your heart “grew three times”?

Now, let’s circle back to the remainder of Paul’s description of what love in action looks like:

Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful;it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

Love never ends. As for prophecies, they will pass away; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will pass away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part,but when the perfect comes, the partial will pass away. When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I gave up childish ways. For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I have been fully known.

So now faith, hope, and love abide, these three; but the greatest of these is love (1 Corinthians 13:4-13, ESV).

Think about the things you’re passionate about. What gets you excited? Who’s God given you the biggest heart for? What can’t you imagine not being able to do? Think about the one thing that’s most important to you right now, then take yourself out of the equation—imagine someone else doing it—and think about this: What would love in action look like in that situation, or with that person or persons, you’re thinking about right now?

Now, go ahead and insert yourself back into your situation, and think about this:

• Realistically—not ideally—what would your love in action in that situation look like? What, if anything, needs to change?
• Who could help you bring more love into that situation or relationship, either by coming alongside you or by his or her example?

Ask God to help you gain a deeper appreciation of His love for you, and that as you understand God’s love more deeply, you’ll know how to show the love of Jesus to those you care most about. And to all, a good night. 🙂

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